What I did with my summer vacation

Dear Summer 2018: Please do not let the door slam repeatedly on your ugly ugly ugly head on the way out, pulverising it into a gritty, grey powder. I say good riddance to you, foul season. Fuck off at once and never return.

It is an understatement that I did not see you coming. I knew September might be a little melancholy, packing the kids off to their new lives in out-of-town universities. But I really thought July & August would be all steaks and pints, unicorns and roses. But that’s not how it played out.

It wasn’t the weather. It wasn’t the market. It wasn’t the Mariners. I can smile through those maladies and often do. No, dude– you were so much more…

Not only did so many of the cool summer things that happen in the best imaginary summers not happen, but lots of things that happen in the worst imaginary nightmare summers actually did. Friends died. Forests burned. Neighbors went mad and threatened to kill me. Governments failed and our entire social structure collapsed.

To be clear & fair: my health and the health of my family remains very solid. I’ve had this weird pressure behind my left eye since mid-August, but otherwise we are all extremely well. They say you don’t have anything if you don’t have your health, so I guess that is actually pretty important. And there’s been no cancer or AIDS or strokes or pancreatitis.

Everything else, though, sucked vigorously.

I suppose it’s worth noting that there’ve been no unwanted pregnancies or automobile accidents or divorce or bench warrants. No one is hooked on opiates. There’s food on the table and gas in the cars. The cats have not been eaten by racoons.

Almost every other solitary thing about Summer 2018, though = LAME.

I guess I am grateful for my killer job, actually. If you have to work, you might as well have a job that you don’t have to try that hard at to be good. I was raised by all women and I think that makes me a better Realtor. I actually do really like my job.

I also still love my community. It’s growing pretty fast, and not all the changes coming with that growth are awesome. But they’re also not all horrible, either, which probably isn’t the case in all situations. So that’s alright.

And the most-important relationships in my life– those with my wife & kids– are in very excellent repair. The kids are both in great grooves, just killing it in the early stages of their respective life adventures away from home. The nest, now empty, is still filled with music & giggling, wine & light. Plus it’s clean!

I guess maybe I’m having a bit of trouble remembering what was so bad about this summer now, after disclaiming the things that musn’t be taken for granted. The mirror got broken off the car again, which sucked (those things are like a thousand bucks). The yellow frisbee broke. I dropped my phone in the lake and had to get a new one– AND I LOST A BUNCH OF PHOTOS THAT WERE ON IT! GOD! 

Huh. Maybe my context is a little wobbly. There were a couple of very horrible things that happened this summer– there’s no getting around that. But when juxtaposed with the big bullets, the basic stuff of life– maybe not so bad.

I’m still jacked for autumn, though. It is my favorite season, October especially. My birthday at the front, Halloween at the back and MLB playoffs all month in-between. The weather is mild and the skies will still be blue occasionally before turning black until June. There is optimism around the University as students return to school, no one yet having failed an exam or barfed in the shower. October starts in two hours. Autumn 2018, I am all up inside you.